Stress Relief Can Be So Stressful!
"Happy thoughts! Happy thoughts! Happy thoughts!"
Friday afternoons are seldom associated with work. Surfing the net, doodling, staring at random spreadsheets, long lunches and Friday afternoon drinks perhaps, but seldom work. So it was a pleasant surprise when several massage therapists arrived on our floor, offering free stress relief massages! They came from a company called Hands On Healing. At first, I thought they were part of a Pentecostal ministry here to cast out evil spirits, heal the infirm and bless the poor in spirit, in which case they were in the right place. They did offer to “lay their hands on us”, but were in fact referring to a simple shoulder and neck massage conducted conveniently in your un-ergonomic office chair. Apparently, someone felt that stress levels were too high and the only solution was massages at your desk. Must be the same person who gave us ‘stress level monitoring’ fridge magnets – I kid you not, I still have mine!
I can’t vouch for stress levels being high or not, but there certainly has been an increase in vending-machine-rage, much gnashing of teeth because we’ve run out of sugar in the kitchen (which you only realise once you’ve made your coffee) and a dramatic escalation in ‘stress level monitoring’ fridge magnet vandalism. But it does beg the question whether deskbound massages are the answer? Indeed, there are many solutions to workplace stress. Feel free to try any of the following ideas which have been suggested by colleagues, HR people and my attorney, for some bizarre reason:
- Meditation – an exercise intended to empty the mind (easier for some), focus one’s thoughts and foster contemplation and relaxation. It’s also a great way to sleep during office hours.
- Reiki – involves transferring warm, healing energy through the palms that can assist with reducing anxiety and depression but not hangovers. It’s always handy to have a Reiki master around the office… you know… just in case the microwave breaks down – they’re great for warming leftovers!
- Breathing – deep and concentrated breathing can assist with lowering your pulse, giving you a sense of control and reducing those stress levels. It’s so quick and easy, you can even do it in the elevator. Unless of course some idiot gets in and takes the lift up only one floor, in which case, for stress relief purposes, feel free to punch them in the face. You’ll feel much better.
- Yoga – a useful technique for controlling the mind and the body… on a mat. Don’t try Bikram Yoga because this requires the room to be heated to 40 degrees Centigrade, which might annoy some of the other people sitting on your floor.
- Exercise – take a brisk walk at lunchtime. It’ll have to be brisk considering the number of muggings round the building…
- Start a stress journal – this can help you identify your stressors, helping you recognise patterns and common themes, such as having to write something every day in stupid, annoying journal.
The other option is to take a long bath, light some scented candles, put on some chilled music and curl up with a good book. This may not be possible in your cubicle.
If you’ve got any suggestions for coping with stress at the office, let me know at diary@jeetesh.net
